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How to Break Up

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In this article, you are going to read 7-step plan for a clean break up between you and your partner.

  1. Before anything else, you need to make sure that you want to go through with this break up. If you are not happy in the relationship, ask yourself the following questions:
    • Do you communicate well?
    • Does your partner accept you as you are?
    • Are you open with your partner? or do you find yourself keeping secrets from him?
    • Do you look forward to seeing him or do you find yourself making excuses to avoid them?
  2. Figure out exactly what you are going to say to your boyfriend. Odds are, the first question he’s going to ask is “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?”. So, on your worksheet write down your reason or reasons. It can be as simple as “I no longer have feelings for you” OR “I don’t think I can trust you anymore”.
  3. Once you have committed to actually breaking up and have figured out exactly what you wanna say, plan out maximum a 3-hour time period for the task. These 3 hours will give him enough time to process but keep the conversation from spiralling into a loop of rehashing the same points over and over again.
  4. Make plans for directly after the conversation. Maybe ask a friend to catch a movie. Giving yourself a concrete out will help you leave any difficult situationĀ  and having something to do afterwards will give you time to process to breakup.
  5. Now, the time has come! Tell your boyfriend that you want to break up with him. Remember, this conversation is gonna be painful for him and you. Nothing you say is gonna change that fact. Be honest but sympathetic. Don’t go overboard and don’t get angry. Just say enough so that you can explain your reasons for breaking up.
  6. When its over, its OVER. Tell him that you are now ex boyfriend and you wont be contacting him. And ask him to respect this wish.
  7. The stuff exchange! This should be a very brief meeting where you can both exchange your belongings. That’s it! but no talks of getting back together. This meeting should take place in public , so you are not tempted to have another long conversation, and if you are worried, take a friend along.

You’ll probably feel low for a while. That’s OK! Just because the relationship is over doesn’t mean it was meaningless. That relationship was an important part of you growing up.

 

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